What would it mean to live a day as though you liked yourself?
We are in so much hate with ourselves these days. You may disagree with this idea, but I bet your thoughts would tell you different. Imagine if I gave you an internal tape recorder for a week to tape your internal dialogue, then asked you to play all your negative self-thoughts back to yourself before you went to sleep each night, I bet it’d be pretty harsh.
It sucks. So, how have we got like this? The promotion of peace, love and kindness builds around us externally as we all constantly give our opinion on how the love seems to have been lost in our world. We say the words and we tell ourselves that we mean it, we pat each other on the back and share the inspiring “be you” quotes and memes, but then just continue on this self-hate destruction path secretly, with no one knowing that our thoughts towards ourselves are still full of hate..
“All She Ever Saw Were Her Flaws, Which Made Her Believe That They Were All She Was Made Of”
When was the last time you spent 10 minutes reminding yourself of how great you are, of what you do well and why you are valuable?
To live a whole day as though you liked yourself would take a lot because your thoughts would have to change.
You wouldn’t be able to wake up in the morning and tell yourself your hair looks crap and therefore you are not worthy to step into society, you would have to simply acknowledge the thought and laugh as you admit that yes, your locks wouldn’t look out of place on Wurzel Gummage, but then you’d give it a brush and think to yourself “but hey, what does it matter?”
You’d no longer pinch and prod at your thighs or tummy and wonder how you have let yourself go so much, you’d instead look at yourself as a whole person and feel pretty chuffed with how your turned out and what a great person you have become, you’d understand that it’s all relative and that things never stay static – even your body, physically it will change, it has changed in the last few years, and it will change again.
But who you are inside will always hold true.
You’d recognise that, truth be told, if you were to lose your body tomorrow you might be a little sad to see it go.
It enables you to run, jump, swim and love. You’d recognise that maybe you need to be kinder to it. Because it’s the only one you have.
When you got to work you’d no longer feel like you were an imposter, constantly fearing that you will be found out for being incompetent or feeling un-important. Instead you would walk into work with your head held high as you recall the ways that you bring value to your work, how many people you help and how far you have come since school.
You wouldn’t be able to feel guilty about things that you think you “should” have done or “ought” to do because you’ll recognise that doing things only bring value to you when you do them because you truly want to. Do things for the right reasons; doing things out of guilt or living in that “shoulda, woulda, coulda” mindset will only result in yet more destructive thinking.
You’d remember that you don’t have to be everything to everyone, all the time.
You’d chose what you want to be and then focus on doing that and doing it really well.
You’d have a day off from weighing yourself and instead use your energy to do something that will bring positivity into your day. That hour after weighing yourself that would usually be filled with calling yourself out for “failing” or “not trying hard enough”, will be spent instead doing something that makes you feel good; doing some exercise that you enjoy, spending time in a positive mental environment…
Thing is, you can live that way. You’ve done it today, this day you are pretending to like yourself, you can see it’s possible to do.
But the thing is – this day doesn’t have to be pretend. It can be this way every day. You have that power at your fingertips to make it happen.
So why not? Because you feel that liking yourself and showing yourself kindness will make things worse, will make you let yourself go even more?
Being mean to yourself with a view to make yourself feel better. Repeat that over and over. Does it sound crazy?
Probably because it is, but that doesn’t stop people believing it to be right.
Not liking yourself is the very thing that started this cycle in the first place.
You can’t expect your body to work with you if you are constantly putting it down, expecting good things to come from negativity is madness – and the crazy thing is that it’s ONLY within this realm of self-love /self-hate that you believe this method of “improvement” to be a valid one.
Kindness should not be reserved solely for other people, it needs to start with yourself.
Try it today. Live as though you like yourself, and if you do it then try another day and then another.
It may turn into a week, and you never know……you may just enjoy it.